No offense, but…
"No offense, but..."
Don’t you hate when someone says that? It means they are going to say something offensive, doesn’t it? They know it's offensive, and say it anyway. It’s like a get out of jail free card. They’re supposed to get off free, while you’re left with the scars.
That phrase has some hostile cousins:
“You’re __________”, followed by “kidding!” (Not so funny at all!)
“You should know better than to take it personally! You know how I am!"
“You should know better than to take me seriously!”
“Geez, can’t you take a joke?”
“I’m sorry it hurt when I ____________ you.” (Note that the apology isn’t for the action, but for the fact that it hurt. It doesn’t imply the hitting won’t continue, either.)
“Sorry, but you _________.” (That means, I’m not sorry, and I blame you.)
Emotional and verbal abuse like this can leave lasting effects. If you are being emotionally abused, there are resources to help you:
Verbal Abuse, Emotional Abuse, and the Narcissist
Depression and Verbal Abuse
Stopping Verbal Abuse in Your Relationship
How to Manage Verbal Abuse
When Words Are Used As Weapons: Youth Can Prevent Verbal Abuse
Here is a list of books you might also find helpful.
If you are aware of other good resources, please leave a comment and I'll update this list. Thanks!
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Image Source:
http://www.safefromabuse.com/
1 comments:
What an insightful look at the way people can introduce that they are about to hurt your feelings! how about:
Can I be honest with you?
You're always so thin-skinned.
You know I don't know what I'm saying when you make me angry.
Being angry is healthy, do you want me to hold it in and get depressed?
thank you for a good insight today. For those that want a free tutorial on how to stop verbal abuse and take your life back without leaving them, go to http://www.YouAreATarget.com
Shelly
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